Meet Brian Whitley: Counseling Approach & Experience
I offer in-person sessions at my Newport Beach office and online sessions for clients located anywhere in California and Florida.
The problems in your life have led you to consider getting some help. However, the thought of talking about your problems with someone else may seem overwhelming. You wonder, “How will a counselor be able to help me? How can I be sure which therapist will be a good fit for me?” Let me tell you a little about myself and my counseling practice to help you answer these questions.
One common complaint about counselors is that they “just listen”. If you are looking for just a good listener, I’m probably not the best counselor for you. I’m empathetic and compassionate, but I also ask thought provoking questions designed to help you think about your problems differently. I give direct feedback about what I believe is keeping you feeling stuck, and I provide tools and strategies to help you achieve your goals. New clients of mine often say how refreshing it is to have a counselor give them practical suggestions for making positive changes.
There aren’t very many males that provide counseling in private practice settings. As a male counselor, I’m able to provide a unique perspective to female clients. Males who are seeking counseling are often fearful of feeling attacked by a female therapist and are sometimes more open to marriage counseling or individual counseling with a male therapist. Many men have a lot of practice pushing emotions down. The thought of talking with a female therapist, who will just keep saying “…and how does that make you feel?” sounds about as fun as a root canal. As a male therapist, I understand how to help men better understand themselves and their emotions without causing them to feel overwhelmed, so they can act with purpose and achieve their goals.
I draw from many different types of therapy to help my clients including Cognitive Behavior Therapy, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Dialectical Behavior Therapy, Harm Reduction, Exposure Therapy, Cognitive Processing Therapy, and Internal Family Systems Therapy. For marriage and couples counseling, I draw from Integrative Behavioral Couples Therapy, The Doherty Approach, and the Developmental Model of Couples Therapy.
I have a unique background with 11 years of experience in law enforcement as a police officer in Orange County.
My law enforcement background gives me a real-world understanding of the challenging issues people face.
My clients are often looking for guidance about their marriage and parenting. I’ve been married for 25 years. The strength of my marriage has come from the intentional effort we have both put into it over the years. In raising our two daughters (ages 20 and 23), I have come to understand the joys and struggles of being a parent of young children who are now adults and living outside of my home.
A few years ago, I began experiencing debilitating migraines. Unlike the head pain experienced by most migraine sufferers, my symptoms (also called aura) mimic many symptoms of stroke. The long journey to get an accurate diagnosis and treatment has helped me better appreciate the health challenges many people face.
I believe that many of the problems in our lives stem from reacting to our emotions in unhelpful ways.
I help people develop the skills to manage their emotions in helpful ways, so they can live intentional, instead of reactive, lives. I co-authored a book (Affect Regulation Training: A Practitioner's Manual) for clinicians that describes a research-based program for teaching effective tools to regulate emotions. The strategies described in the book are incorporated into my sessions with clients.
While I work with a variety of different issues in my counseling practice, I specialize in a few areas including addictions to drugs and alcohol as well as behavioral addictions (e.g., sex addiction). I use a harm reduction philosophy, which basically means that I help clients achieve whatever goals they have regarding their addiction, whether that be a moderation or an abstinence goal. Click here to read more about my approach to addiction treatment.
I also specialize in helping married couples when one or both spouses are considering a separation or divorce. Using a specific, research-based format called Discernment Counseling, I help couples gain greater clarity and confidence in their decision making about the future of their marriage, based on a deeper understanding of what’s happened in their marriage and each person’s contribution to the problems. Click here to read more about Discernment Counseling.
As a former police officer, I have a unique understanding of the struggles that retired and active law enforcement officers often face. I’m honored to specialize in providing individual and marriage counseling to police officers and their spouses.
I am passionate about serving my clients and my community. In this spirit of service, I’ve been trained as a volunteer facilitator of SMART Recovery® meetings, which help people recover from addictions to behaviors or substances. I am also a regular volunteer in the children’s program at my church.
Overview of my Therapy and Counseling Services
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Individual Counseling
I’m an active and directive therapist and focused on helping you achieve your goals.
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Marriage Counseling
Consistent effort and intention is required to have a good marriage. We are all either working on our marriage or our divorce. I give spouses practical tools to improve their marriage.
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Discernment Counseling
Your marriage is in trouble and either you or your spouse is considering divorce. You may be the one who wants to save the marriage, or you may be the spouse who is considering divorce but also unsure if this is what you really want.
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Counseling for Police Officers & Other Law Enforcement
As a former police officer for 11 years, I understand how your career as a first responder can negatively impact your personal life.
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Addictions to Substances and Behaviors
I believe that we are not powerless over addictions. By learning and practicing new skills, we can break the chains of addiction. I support clients that use 12-Step resources and alternative programs such as SMART Recovery.
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Family & Friends of Those Struggling with Addictions
Addiction impacts the entire family. I can teach you how to use the power of your relationship to facilitate positive change and how not to make things worse.
Licensure
Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist LMFT48949 Expires 5/31/26
State of California Board of Behavioral Sciences
Telehealth Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist
Florida Department of Health, License #TPMF1441
Education
Chapman University
Master of Arts in Psychology
Graduated with Honors
Azusa Pacific University
Bachelor of Arts in Psychology
Magna Cum Laude
Advanced Training
I have received advanced training in the following:
Emotion Regulation
Exposure Response Prevention (E.R.P.) treatment for Obsessive Compulsive Disorder
Addictions to drugs, alcohol, and behaviors (such as sex addictions)
Mindfulness Meditation
Domestic Violence
Professional Memberships
International OCD Foundation
California Association of Marriage and Family Therapists (CAMFT)
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